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Jim Thomas

Novena

Hail and blessed be the hour and moment in which the Son of God was born of the most pure Virgin Mary, at midnight, in Bethlehem, in piercing cold. In that hour, vouchsafe, O my God! to hear my prayer and grant my desires, through the merits of Our Saviour Jesus Christ, and of His Blessed Mother. Amen.

Touch Base

I "feel" as if I'm running out of steam. I ask Jesus to intercede. You wonder about the hereafter and you just want to know. You also don't dare ask questions for awhile. You say your willing to walk by faith but eventually it feels as if all the questions and uncertainty just have worn you down to the point of saying, "lets just get on with it already." So then we gather ourselves up, reminding ourselves we're tough as anyone we've ever seen and then give ourselves license to medicate because its getting to be boring as shit.

Granola

Concerning my check in. Bored with my own check in's. Okay, how do I feel? Hungry. Like I should be doing something. Aware of heavy weather on this continent. Mercifully, headache free. Maybe God is pleased for me to pray for others as the thought occurs. Does God want me to paint?

Self Check

My Poor Guts

Yesterday my bowels were bright red and I felt as if I had to go all day. And I was going a little each time. Today, like at mass this morning, my guts feel horrible and there is dark blood coating my turds. I also have been experiencing pain in my gut that, kind of, feels like gas pain but is different, sharper! I did have a spicy pizza on Friday. But those pains were before Friday. Going on for maybe a week. Red turds just started this weekend. I suspect the naproxen. I want to go off of them please. Today? I feel so shitty that I just want to lay in bed, with ice on my head because I have a low grade headache and my guts ache and I'm dropping red turds.

James Thomas

What's This?

I feel a drag. A heaviness from my center. First thought is drugs can fix it. Second thought, maybe not.

James Thomas

That dream

I was comfortable in a setting and then we moved to a larger social group setting and I was less comfortable than a larger yet group and I was even more uncomfortable. Grasping for comfort. While they were ready for and excited to be dancing, i thought, I was aware that I was going to fall apart, over time here. So then I look at myself over time and realize the pain because I was less than what I thought I was.... Way less maybe.

Cousin not into Texting

So, that doesn't mean she rejects me. She is just not wanting to do that

This Day

I felt lonely and isolated. Like everyone is in their own little bubble.