While praying the rosary in the tub tonight, I saw my nervous looking gnawed finger, holding the centerpiece of the rosary containing an image of Mary. Her face was nestled in the flesh of my thumb as if to comfort, heal and give hope.
Oh Lord, I offer up my restlessness.
So, I woke up thinking about all this stuff from the past. Most of it was troublesome, kind of an uneasy feeling that accumulated as I thought about more stuff. I realized the mounting bad start to my day and prayed to Jesus to take this twisted mess and fix it. At light speed he showed me a scar on my hand that I got in the Navy. I was a cook and while opening cans I cut my hand on a previously opened can. I used to leave the lids up and then go on to the next can. I learned from that cut and resulting infection, that you shouldn't leave the lids up, you should bend them down within the can. That's what Jesus was showing me. The scar was on my hand; my life has happened and I can see it just like I can see the scar. I learned from that cut; I learned from those experiences in my life. I should just put my trust in Jesus and through his intersession I can proceed through this life. He makes it possible to navigate through my scars.
I heard a priest during his homily say, "some think of God as their cosmic buddy." He was implying that God is not our cosmic buddy but we are his creation and completely dependent on His grace.
I agree…the cosmic buddy thing doesn't work for me. I think of God as our Father who has no choice but to be the truth and leads us into the truth.
I can breath again, finally went to the doctor for my allergies and I can now sit outside and just chill. Thank you Lord.
How do we deal with suicide, especially with somebody who has money, prestige and is over the hump?
I don't know the whole answer but I do know that memory from scripture, tradition and the magisterial teaching help.
Being lukewarm in faith is dangerous.
I must remember, always, that things of this world are passing, my future is eternity.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death.
I remember my dead. I pray for my living.
Outside it is beautiful and I am strangely at peace.
Jesus, I love you
Cut lose. That was my message today and yesterday. It will feel to you as a sea creature may feel who has lost his mooring to the piling or dock he was attached to. Now do that many times a day, realize it accept it with God's grace. You are the vine attached to the branch but your connection is not what you think. You will find that connection when you let go of the dead moorings you're attached to.
A working example, there is a guy I know. I thought of him and was at peace with the world as long as I have him in a category. The whole world is cool but he must be put in a place that I want him and if he is not, I panic. Well, that's all wrong. I have to let go of the moorings, realize I am adrift but it is not really adrift, it is free from dead attachments. There I think I got it now that I have written it.
On my bike, on the way home from work, the Lord put this in my heart, "You can repeat prayers from memory over and over and that is a start but it would be best to talk to me when you are able."
So I did and He told me that perfection is only accomplished through perfect love, in my heart he told me to seek his grace when I think of my brothers and sisters.
This morning He showed me that it is possible to make mistakes when I repeat prayer while I should be concentrating on work.
So my meditation today on the Rosary during my bike ride was this. Mary and Elizabeth were there for each other during the most important event that ever happened. They were helping and rejoicing in each other's condition while ensuring the wellbeing of their babies. They were also nourishing and encouraging us! These blessed women were tenderly ensuring our lives in Christ. That is a very beautiful and self-giving thing.
I love you Mother!
