While praying the rosary in the tub tonight, I saw my nervous looking gnawed finger, holding the centerpiece of the rosary containing an image of Mary. Her face was nestled in the flesh of my thumb as if to comfort, heal and give hope.
Oh Lord, I offer up my restlessness.
So, I woke up thinking about all this stuff from the past. Most of it was troublesome, kind of an uneasy feeling that accumulated as I thought about more stuff. I realized the mounting bad start to my day and prayed to Jesus to take this twisted mess and fix it. At light speed he showed me a scar on my hand that I got in the Navy. I was a cook and while opening cans I cut my hand on a previously opened can. I used to leave the lids up and then go on to the next can. I learned from that cut and resulting infection, that you shouldn't leave the lids up, you should bend them down within the can. That's what Jesus was showing me. The scar was on my hand; my life has happened and I can see it just like I can see the scar. I learned from that cut; I learned from those experiences in my life. I should just put my trust in Jesus and through his intersession I can proceed through this life. He makes it possible to navigate through my scars.
I heard a priest during his homily say, "some think of God as their cosmic buddy." He was implying that God is not our cosmic buddy but we are his creation and completely dependent on His grace.
I agree…the cosmic buddy thing doesn't work for me. I think of God as our Father who has no choice but to be the truth and leads us into the truth.
I can breath again, finally went to the doctor for my allergies and I can now sit outside and just chill. Thank you Lord.
How do we deal with suicide, especially with somebody who has money, prestige and is over the hump?
I don't know the whole answer but I do know that memory from scripture, tradition and the magisterial teaching help.
Being lukewarm in faith is dangerous.
I must remember, always, that things of this world are passing, my future is eternity.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death.
I remember my dead. I pray for my living.
Outside it is beautiful and I am strangely at peace.
Jesus, I love you
Cut lose. That was my message today and yesterday. It will feel to you as a sea creature may feel who has lost his mooring to the piling or dock he was attached to. Now do that many times a day, realize it accept it with God's grace. You are the vine attached to the branch but your connection is not what you think. You will find that connection when you let go of the dead moorings you're attached to.
A working example, there is a guy I know. I thought of him and was at peace with the world as long as I have him in a category. The whole world is cool but he must be put in a place that I want him and if he is not, I panic. Well, that's all wrong. I have to let go of the moorings, realize I am adrift but it is not really adrift, it is free from dead attachments. There I think I got it now that I have written it.
On my bike, on the way home from work, the Lord put this in my heart, "You can repeat prayers from memory over and over and that is a start but it would be best to talk to me when you are able."
So I did and He told me that perfection is only accomplished through perfect love, in my heart he told me to seek his grace when I think of my brothers and sisters.
This morning He showed me that it is possible to make mistakes when I repeat prayer while I should be concentrating on work.
So my meditation today on the Rosary during my bike ride was this. Mary and Elizabeth were there for each other during the most important event that ever happened. They were helping and rejoicing in each other's condition while ensuring the wellbeing of their babies. They were also nourishing and encouraging us! These blessed women were tenderly ensuring our lives in Christ. That is a very beautiful and self-giving thing.
I love you Mother!
Two Mexicans came into our store this week at different times. One guy wanted a hundred dollars worth of emitters for drip irrigation. This is unusual; most vineyard people have a specific count of emitters needed. He didn't he was in a nice truck had tons of cash and spoke zero English. I labeled him a dope grower and then I saw the blessed Mother medal around his neck. The blue of the medal seemed to radiate in my eye and I was given this grace. It was something like this, "this is one of My children as are you, and you will treat and think of My child as you would Jesus." I was very moved by this encounter.
The next one is shameful. A gentleman was standing outside the store and appeared to be very confused. He also spoke zero English. He had 2 or 3 social security cards and drivers licenses that he wanted to give to me. I asked him in broken Spanish if he needed help, he said yes. I asked if he needed work, he said yes. Then a Spanish speaking customer approached and translated a little. Basically the Mexican man was very confused. He asked for some power, I stupidly said, "PGE?" He said yes and then I went inside to Google a phone # for PGE. He took off quickly.
When I got home, in the shower I thought, "Why didn't you give him your lunch or your rosary or some cash? I was so thinking of my own well being and the problem this guy generated for me that I couldn't see him as a brother with a need I could try to fill.
uGG… I'm so self absorbed. I didn't do as my Mother had plainly shown me with the first brother. Help me do better with this issue Jesus, Amen
I find myself thinking thoughts that lead me into sin. Thoughts like, "I shouldn't being doing this for that person" or "I don't have the patience for this" or "I'm above this task."
What has helped me with this? I pray the Rosary throughout the day. If I miss count and do 75 Hail Marys instead of 10…. big deal.
Usually my hands are working so I can't hold my Rosary. It is like a chant. I will tell you that it works.
Our Blessed Mother loves us so much!!!
This morning, I was praying before I left for work. 
Poison Oak = little bumps that occur 60 seconds after you give in to the itch.
Scratching the itch is an incredible pleasure.
Not scratching is something I was never able to do, I always gave in.
Since becoming Catholic and now getting poison oak, I have not given in.
I don't think I'm reaching here.
I will not walk around hoping for the demise of somebody because I feel they are responsible for me being there and miserable. I can resolve this issue within myself through God's grace. That requires prayer whenever I feel myself going down that misguided road.
Thank you Jesus for helping me identify this sinful and futile thought process, thank you Jesus for being my hope for resolution in this difficulty.
Beautiful Mother, I love you, Amen
I have poison oak, I threw out my back, and I had to go to work today after a long lay-off.
I said the rosary 3 times this morning and when I got home I told my wife that I am going to bed and I will not get up till tomorrow. I can't sleep. The sisters said something about dying by pin pricks rather than crucifixion.
Quit complaining Mr. Thomas
Last night, at the Easter Vigil, I went into church a little worn out with my faith. I had been arguing with Shirley a little, temptations to get angry. I was mad at God for not giving me the spiritual gifts that I thought I needed.
Well, Easter Vigil marks the end of Lent and the beginning of Easter and so it was in my soul. The service was fantastic. Lights and candles, baptisms and confirmations. There was a wonderful choir and the participants were singing with great joy. When I saw a new mother and her baby get baptized I almost started crying, when she received the Eucharist I was really moved. She was so happy, hugging her family with a smile of inner peace and union. I could tell she had been around in the world but she had come home tonight and I knew she was in the right place.
As I walked back to my pew, after receiving the Eucharist, I was caught up in the Holy Spirit. It was marvelous!
Ok Lord lets put on our packs and walk some more, Amen
At night, when I am sitting in bed, there is just me and our Lord.
No computer fans moving air or hardrives clicking, no TV in the
background no work staring me in the face. In that time I usually
feel united with Jesus. My love is with me at all times.
Last night. God gave me reflections on a person I once worked with. That person was stealing something. Then I prayed for him and his kids. Why do I dream so much. I was dreaming an hour after I went to bed.
Write about the transition from gaining anything childlike from life to the realization that we have suffering laid out before us and we understand that. We are able to deal with that because of God's grace. Embrace that, accept it and find joy in it, it is just that simple.
Lord, I look to you for these graces, Amen
